Tracie Fountain

Live a Healthy, Balanced Life

Weight Loss Tip #10: Do You Need to Get Over This?

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A couple of months ago, I ran into an old roommate I hadn’t seen in years. I recognized her right away and went up to say hi but she looked at me like I was a total stranger. I realized I had changed so much since the time we shared space that she did not even recognize me.
 
Several hours later, I began reflecting on what my life looked like back then and how I used to see myself. In those days, I was really struggling with my weight and did not want to go anywhere or do anything. I was embarrassed by how I looked and that embarrassment led to isolation. 
 
In other words, I realized how much I thought about and focused on myself.
 
I was constantly thinking about my body and food and it left little head space for anything or anyone else. I was not a joyful person and not very fun to be around. The more I thought about it, the more obvious it became what the problem was: I was really self-centered. 
 
Yep. You read that correctly…I WAS SUPER SELF-CENTERED!
 
Now that I’m at a completely different place in my life, I’ve taken time to reflect on just how dangerous self-centeredness is and how agreeing with those icky thoughts and feelings negatively impacted me in so many different ways.
 
Back then, I was easily offended, could not ever take a compliment and never really saw the good in much of anything. I was a complainer. I was so focused on my own issues and did very little to help anyone else. Although it’s not fun to admit, it’s the sad truth and feels “gross” to even think about.
 
You may be wondering at this point what all of this has to do with weight loss?
 
A few things, actually. In fact, science now proves that when you help other people (i.e., when you take the focus off of yourself), you change your body chemistry for the better. The results of one particular study showed that people who help others have a lower mortality rate than those who do not. It exemplifies the fact that your body is NOT a bank account but a biochemistry lab and when your body is pumping out stress hormones because you are so focused on your own issues, it is definitely not in weight loss mode.
 
When you’re helping others, your perspective changes. Reaching out to others who are in a crisis or more difficult place than where you’re at causes you to naturally focus on someone and something other than yourself.
 
When you stop and reflect on the kinds of difficult situations others are in, you are almost guaranteed to realize that your life is really…quite blessed! There is almost always someone else around you who has more weight to lose, a worse diagnosis, is in a more dire financial predicament and so forth. 
 
If you’re reading this and wondering if you qualify as being self-centered, consider the following statements and see if any of them ring a bell:
 
  • I am easily offended or easily angered about things that really aren’t that big of a deal.
  • It is difficult for me to receive positive feedback.
  • I feel like I am on an emotional roller coaster more often than not.
  • I find it hard to believe the best about others.
  • I fall apart when situations turn out differently than I expected.
  • I am fearful about many things and get anxious very easily.

Let’s be honest in saying that at least one—if not several of these—pertain to most of us. But that’s my point! We have become a society so focused on SELF that there’s often not much room for anyone or anything else in our lives.

The take away point I keep coming back to is…What you focus on GROWS!

Taking the focus off of yourself allows you to completely change the way you are thinking and what you are thinking about. And when you do this, you really can and will change your body chemistry. You really can change the way you respond and this really can positively impact the hormones that play major roles in whether or not your body loses extra weight it might be carrying.

When I started looking beyond myself and my own situation, things finally began to change for me in terms of weight loss. Yes I did start eating real food, and yes that was important in the healing of my body and the loss of 30+ pounds, but it was only one piece of the puzzle. I didn’t shed a ton of weight until I really started thinking about what I was thinking about and stopped focusing so much on myself and all of my “problems.” Once I stopped honing in on all of the negatives, I began to look on the outside like I felt on the inside: healed, healthy and whole.

So what will you choose to focus on today?

If you begin to focus on how you can help others versus all of the things that may not be perfect in your own life, you will have found the true antidote to self-centeredness: Humility.

humility2

And that my friends is one of the key components to living a healthy, balanced life.

Change your thoughts. Change your body chemistry. Change your life!

But in order to do that…you just might have to get over yourself! 🙂

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Comments

  1. Today’s post spoke volumes! This is me to a tee! I have never thought of myself as self-centered but what you say is so true. I guess I am. I need to get over myself! 🙂

  2. I am totally in “Self-Centered” mode and would love to truly not be!! I have always loved helping others and want to do again. Somehow lost my zest of helping and doing for others over the past few years… I am a mother of four older children and part of me feels like I lost myself in the process of raising them and require some much needed “me time”. Is it fair to say I need some recharging time? Or push through and continue to put others first? Balancing life and questioning how much to do for others has always been a struggle for me. I am at my heaviest weight ever outside of being pregnant. I am open to anything at this point.

    • You can’t take care of others if you don’t take care of yourself first. I say, put yourself first. Then you will have the energy to help others.

    • Thanks for your questions, Kerri. Because of the complexity of this issue, I am writing you an email to address some of your points on a more personal level since we have a relationship together and I feel like I understand exactly where you’re coming from :).

  3. This might sound silly, but what might you recommend doing to get over yourself & start helping others?

    • Hi Michelle,

      You are exactly right and we did our best to cover that in the beginning of the article. There are links in the article above but here is what said about helping others.

      ———
      A few things, actually. In fact, science now proves that when you help other people (i.e., when you take the focus off of yourself), you change your body chemistry for the better. The results of one particular study showed that people who help others have a lower mortality rate than those who do not. It exemplifies the fact that your body is NOT a bank account but a biochemistry lab and when your body is pumping out stress hormones because you are so focused on your own issues, it is definitely not in weight loss mode.

      When you’re helping others, your perspective changes. Reaching out to others who are in a crisis or more difficult place than where you’re at causes you to naturally focus on someone and something other than yourself.

      When you stop and reflect on the kinds of difficult situations others are in, you are almost guaranteed to realize that your life is really…quite blessed! There is almost always someone else around you who has more weight to lose, a worse diagnosis, is in a more dire financial predicament and so forth.

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